reorientation

The past few weeks have been wild and full. While positive overall, I begin to see a propensity I have for overextending myself, for letting myself get caught up in noise and rush, for biting off much more than is healthy for me to chew.

I usually tend to be quite productive, successful at those things I undertake, but at a cost to my own serenity and my own well being that is both physical and spiritual.

At this point in my journey, I am setting boundaries, gauging limitations, accepting the fact that I personally cannot do it all, that I am not omnipotent, a superhero, or (that primal childhood yearning) perfect...

Today I enjoyed the pursuit of small domestic agendas: watching movies, napping, cleaning my room.  There has been so much clutter of activity that I'm actually looking forward to just working my job and living my life.  

I am beginning to discard the American mythology of busy-ness as a way of life, as a means of justifying, in some warped Puritanic way, one's right to existence.  Time is so short, that projects, activities, relationships, endeavors, must be sought that enrich the soul, not just perpetuate the machine.

There is an art in living well, or perhaps, living well means something totally different today than it did when I was still in the throes of my disease.  There is an option for peace now, and as good ol' Margaret insists, "peace at all costs.'

Passion, beauty, and love, folks--24 hours at a time...

image: Kerry Skarbakka